Monday, 31 January 2011

News Flash!

Do not allow your man to use an iron on a 40 degree day.

It could result in him then getting dressed right next to the ironing board in an otherwise perfectly spacious spare room.

This WILL result in him bumping in to the ironing board. And this WILL result in the iron taking a nose dive.

The end result is a costly affair in which you don't get your full bond back...

Wednesday, 19 January 2011

Hotdog. Jumping frog. Al...bur...queque.

I don't know if that's how you spell alburqueque. But you know where in coming from!

Summer brings more nightlife to Melbourne than normal. Which is fabulous edible and intoxicating. In the alcoholic way.

Take Wednesday night. No longer is it hump night. It is a veritable feast during summer as Victoria Night Market opens from 5.30 to late serving pints of the yummiest sangria and every type of food imaginable. Except jerk chicken. I miss jerk chicken. But emu burgers, gumbo, crepes, paella, cupcakes and of course as photo'd - Bratwurst. The chips are crap. Certainly not the German variety you would expect. But the sausages are pretty damned good.

Trust me when I say I have sampled the sangria a few times an it is consistently fabulous.

Then take the rest of the week. We here in Melbourne have three different open air cinemas. Lucky us. One on the roof of a bar Which is conveniently also a bar. One in the more romantic of settings in the botanical gardens. And one at at kilda sea baths.

Already due to weather conditions not being as they used to be many have been cancelled. I was all booked to go to Heathers when they cancelled it - boo hiss. The last time i watched it must have been on the foleys couch. But many more classics are scheduled which I will try and get a look in to. From breakfast at tiffanys to Donnie darko, with some new releases in-between. I have yet to get Liams buy in to a romantic picnic blanket viewing for two. But I will work on it... In the meantime though - yummy memories of bratty and sauerkraut. Yum.

Thursday, 13 January 2011

Wednesday, 5 January 2011

Orange peel

Last Tuesday two things happened.

1 - spider bite - ouchy
2 - sun burn - double ouchy

So here I am a week later suffering from an ailment that I can't even remember the last time I suffered from... A type of leprosy normally reserved for those who choose to rotisserie chicken themselves in the sun while smothered in baby oil. A skin condition akin to a snake shedding it's skin all because the person is too lazy to moisturize. I am neither of those people. And yet here I am inflicted by the same disease - Peeling.

I haven't peeled since I was a teenager I think. Although I could be wrong. And possibly am. The important thing is that I don't actually remember the last time as it was that long long ago.

I have suffered from worse things than peeling. There was one ski trip in the early 90's where the Fenton family and mine learned the true value of zinc. Kerri and I drank (and ate) through straws after the first day in the sun. Blisters covered our faces, hands and anywhere else the sun had reached. It hurt to laugh, it hurt to eat, it hurt when the sun touched our faces, and it hurt when you accidentally rolled over in the night and popped a blister. Juicy. And ouchy.

There was this particularly juicy one on Keza's ear that looked like when it popped half her ear would fall off. It did pop. But the ear stayed on. And every time I think of our panda eyed blister party on our faces I hear a woman in an American drawl tut at us and say "cancer cancer cancer" in the toilets of the burger king on the American base we had stopped for lunch (and shopping) in.

I will now go to ensure the collar of my shirt is high enough to stop the people of the train suffering the shock of seeing my juvenile skin condition. Long shirts in sunny Melbourne suck. But do prevent further damage.

P.S - spidey bite has eased but may have left some skin discoloration. God damned spidey.

Monday, 3 January 2011

Caterpillar Clare

Happy new years people!

For new year here we went trotting down to Purnim. A town with a rather small population in the vicinity of Warrnambool. As ms Kate And mr Billy have a shiny new house built and as a house warming they were having a new years party.

It has to be one of the more unique house parties or even new years parties I've ever been to. With a path of fairy lights leading to the dance floor set up under the trees with disco lighting and sound system along with an abandoned vehicle sprayed gold. Oh the things you can get up to in your very own trees on your very own 2 1/2 acre property. Alas we didn't see the resident koala - probably kept away by the teeny tiny bit of noise that the sound system produced. But we did hear froggies singing and when up the next morning discovered some had never even been asleep!

But Clare snug as a bug in her sleeping bag in our dorm room was quite a picture.